Trained Monkey

This is how ESL (English as a Second Language) teachers sometimes feel in countries like China. "Come on," they say, "Sing a song or do a dance..." We are trained to teach, but we are asked to perform.

Understandable though. We see some kids who have been learning English in school for years, and never actually met a real live English speaker. Some kids are terrified - but then we don't know what the adults around them have told them about us "Laowai". Other kids are just dying for a chance to try out those phrases they have been mimicking from their Chinese English teachers. And they want to hear someone "say something" in this language they have been learning, hopefully something meaningful.

Which still doesn't really explain why they ask for a song or dance. Except maybe that they are taught English in the form of little songs with dances. It's a good way to practise and learn, as long as they realise it's not 'real'. I have stood there and listened to "Dear Teacher" belted out in their piping voices, it was almost enough to draw tears to my eyes ... imagine our children back home singing this to their teacher.

But, back to the monkey. Poor little chap. Look at how his little feet are on top of each other to get away from the cold pavement, and one little hand is tucked away while the other keeps a watch over the chain that is likely to be yanked again at any moment. My family had a pet one of these when I was a child (in Nigeria) and he could be quite vicious. But he loved mashed potato and would pop it into his cheeks and jump up and down making monkey noises ... like maybe it was too hot.

This photo cost three kuai. They were using this little chap to beg on the street. Anyone who paid him any attention was then asked for money.